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The Short and Long of It; Or The Complaint of Douglas

Songs performed by: Valerie Gordon, Michael Pokorny, Spencer Savoie, and Mark Travis.

Words by B.
Music by HENRY TUCKER

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1. He punished me -- in fight, you see,
And said I had the wrong of it;
For I am small, and he is tall,
And that's the short and long of it.
[Chorus]
Oh! that's the short and long of it.

2. In Illinois -- he was the boy
I met -- they made a song of it;
For I am small, and he is tall,
And that's the short and long of it.
[Chorus]
Oh! that's the short and long of it.

3. I gave him lip -- his tongue's a whip --
Alas! he made a thong of it;
For I am small, and he is tall &c.

4. He split a rail -- through my coat tail
He quickly thrust the prong of it;
For I am small, &c. -- Chorus.

5. They made me ride -- in vain I cried,
My tongue I made a gong of it;
For I am small, &c. -- Chorus.

6. I'm five feet one, that lofty son
Is six feet four, and strong of it;
For I am small, &c. -- Chorus.

7. They pour for me, weak praise you see,
"He drinks the whole Souchong of it,"
For I am small, &c. -- Chorus.